Keeping it real

Game Over April 15, 2012

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I DID IT!!!!!

I tried to sleep well on Friday night, but that didn’t turn out very well.  I woke up at 6 on Saturday morning with a stomach full of butterflies.  I could barely feel my toes by the time the race started (although I’m not sure if that was nerves or the colder temperature).  The second I picked up my foot to start, I was in my zone to get to the finish line.  I didn’t have anyone to run with, but when there are nearly 2,000 other runners including 6 and 7 years-old, you get pretty motivated to keep going.  I had read an article about breaking the race into 4 parts, each mile and the final 0.1 mile; I did this, and all of a sudden, I was looking at the official time clock at the finish line.

I had a few goals for the 5k, but nothing terribly difficult.  I wanted to finish (check).  I wanted to run the entire thing (almost check, only walked 2/10 mile).  I thought I could finish in under 45 minutes (38:13!, check!).  And finally, I was rewarding myself after the run with a mimosa and a pedicure (done and done).

I’m not sure I would call myself a runner per say, but I am really enjoying running and what it has added (or subtracted) to my life.  I am incredibly proud of myself, and am looking forward to finding my next 5k.


Real World April 13, 2012

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Reality is beginning to set in.  In roughly two hours, I will be picking up my bib and t-shirt for my first 5k.  I have never physically worked harder for something in my life.  This has been a tall mountain to climb and I’m ready for the top.  I am beyond nervous and anxious.

A few people have volunteered to cheer me on through the run, and I’ve (politely) turned them down.  Matt and Annie are the most important people in the world to me, and it only seems fitting that it’s them who I collapse, cry, and celebrate with.

I am incredibly proud of myself for having kept running towards my goal (hardy har har).  Tomorrow when I cross the finish line, I’ll be astonished at my accomplishment.

A little reflection of the last 4 months:

When I began running January 9th, I couldn’t even imagine getting to April 14th.  I have trained for four months because I knew there would be bumps in the road, and there were.  I was sick a few times, Annie was too, and somehow life seem to creep into my normal routine.  Three weeks ago, I wasn’t sure that I would physically be able to run a mile, much less 3.1 miles.  I’m still not sure, but hey, a girl can dream.  I have lost 7 pounds since January and dropped a pants size.  I can see the changes in my body that others have seen for months.  I’m still completely aware of my body and what it looks like, but I am beginning to become more proud of it.  I’ve had a lot of life changes in the last 5 years, but this four month journey has hopefully been the most lifelong change I’ve made for myself.  I was inspired to run by my sister Anna and my friend L, but I hope to be an example for Annie.


A very big thank you to everyone who have asked how my training was going, encouraged me to keep going, and giving me advice.  I’ll be thinking about all of it while I run.  🙂


Baby Steps March 13, 2012

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Today marks exactly one month until my first 5k.  I have found that I really enjoy running outside (trust me, words I never thought would come out of my mouth) and will do whatever I can to avoid running on the treadmill (more words that have never come out of my mouth).  The current weather pattern is helping my desire to be outside; Annie and I have been outside at some point over the last 4 days.

BIG NEWS:  Annie had tubes put in her ears last Friday.  ABOUT TIME!  These tubes better solve all of her infections; I have no idea what I’ll do if they don’t.  Annie had a 6th and final double ear infection just before the surgery, and while she was on antibiotics from her 5th infection.  I’m over it.

BIGGER NEWS:  I have been wearing a size 14 for at least 8 months.  Today, I wore a pair of jeans in a size 12.  IN. PUBLIC.


I have been moving at about 8 million miles an hour, and only in the last 3 days have I had a chance to breathe.  I’ve been a little overwhelmed, but I’ve been able to smile through the whole thing, and it hasn’t been a fake smile.  I am loving my life, my daughter, and my husband, and all that I have surrounding me.


Life Goes On February 28, 2012

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I’m writing two posts tonight…a general catch-you-up one and a recipe one.

The Catch-up

Life has gone on.   Matt’s traveling this week; this is his annual geek conference in San Fransisco.  I’m looking forward to Friday night when he comes home, but I appreciate the feeling of missing him.  We both apologized for what had been happening over the past two years before he left.  I love loving Matt.

The weather has been so nice recently, and we’ve been taking advantage of it.  I’ve recognized that Annie needs to use her energy outside of the house, and not just going to the grocery store.  We had a great day of the park and playing with our neighbor on Sunday; Anne slept for over 14 hours that night.  Luckily, this week is very “unplanned,” so I took advantage of that today.  We went to two different playgrounds, had pancakes at IHOP (it’s Free Pancake Day), and a special treat of ice cream after one playground experience.  I have the best kid.

Running had been a struggle last week, but I’ve made a point this week to get back into it.  7 1/2 weeks until the 5k.  I finally ran outside on Monday.  I think I like running outside over on the treadmill, it’s not nearly as boring.  I didn’t kill myself, just a little over a mile with some walking too.  Anyone interested in an outside run sometime this weekend?

Here we are on the eve of Leap Year 2012, and I’ll do a quick recap of my resolutions.  The running is clearly going, I’m not sure well, but I’m able to propel myself forward.  The actual weight loss is an unending battle that one day I will concur.  My quest to organize our house is at a complete stand still.  I have to start this soon, none of our dresser’s can hold much more.

All in all, for nearly three months into this new, life-changing, year life is 100 times better than it was this time last year.  (Of course, this time last year, I was about to go on a very lovely Caribbean vacation, and this year I’m not.)  Life Goes On.  🙂


Let’s Play Catch-Up February 21, 2012

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I’m sorry I slacked on the recipes last week.  I have plenty of recipes to tell everyone about, and I will this week, I swear.  On the flip side, I registered for my 5k!!!!  Even though I’ve registered, I’ve been slacking in the running.  My mistake was not staying with my schedule while Matt was gone; I decided to sleep in on Wednesday. I’m about 4 days behind on my training schedule.  Now I have to start thinking about running outside, and potentially training with other people.  April 14th is a lot closer than when I started training.

No surprise, Annie has consumed me for the last week.  Aside from my typical mom consumption, Annie had a cold starting Thursday, then a fever on Friday.  Tylenol wasn’t bringing her fever down and she slept with me Friday night (even when she was a newborn, she’s never slept in our bed), so we went to the pediatrician on Saturday.  Fifth double ear infection since November, and Annie’s on antibiotics until she has her tubes in in 16 days.  This also ruined my very well laid plan for going to the gym on Saturday.  Since Annie’s ear infections started, the pediatrician has noticed a slight murmur in Annie’s heart; we saw a cardiologist today to check it.  She’s fine.  One of the front desk ladies at the pediatrician’s practically knows our credit card number, she’s seen us so much.

I love Matt.  In some strange way, the way I feel about Matt is almost similar to how I felt when we first started dating.  I’m giddy to see him every evening.  When he came home on Saturday, I didn’t want to let go of him.  As you can all attest to, not very long ago I was second-guessing my marriage.  This is where I belong.

Matt had a daddy-daughter day on Monday, as I had training at work.  He’s done this before, but Annie’s energy level is way different now.  They went to the park and went on the swings and the slide, and then they got the mail and then walked over to school to get me.  Matt leaves again on Monday, and I am already looking forward to his return on Friday.

Tomorrow, I swear, recipes!  I’m trying a stellar (well, hopefully) Crock Pot recipe for dinner tomorrow, and it will be fresh in my mind.  I’m hoping to make you all drool.


Happy New Year! January 1, 2012

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January 1, 2012.

Today’s the day.  Today’s the day it all changes.

This blog is part of my resolutions for 2012.  I’ve always made resolutions, and have only stuck with a few (Hallmark has made mad bank on me since 2005).  This year is different.  Here’s my list:

1. Clean my house.  Closets will be organized, papers will be filed, the garage will have shelves, and FreeCycle will become my best friend.

2. Lose 30 pounds.  Actually, more specifically, I’m going to weigh 150 pounds or less by December 31, 2012.  I currently weigh 189 pounds.  This goal includes learning to run properly, and then running in at least 2 5k races.

3. Make me better.  As some of you know, I had a daughter about 14 months ago.  Since then I have been struggling with depression.  I started seeing a therapist in August, and will be seeing a psychiatrist in two weeks.  I’m the girl who always has a smile, and is always put together, on the outside.

3s. Stop sugar coating life.  I’m a messy person, not just physically, but mentally and emotionally too.  This blog is the beginning of the end of my sugar coating.  Please call me out when I am sugar coating things.  No topic is off limits; names and faces will be changed, but the scenario will be true. 🙂

I am looking forward to reaching out for help, finally.

This blog will include my triumphs and sorrows while tackling these resolutions, as well as the struggles I face as a young mother and wife.  I’ll include fabulous recipes Matt approves, great discounts I find (and not just from Living Social), and as always, I’ll ask for advice and guidance.